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Wednesday, 25 June 2008

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Friday, 22 September 2006

Currently Listening
1967-1970
By The Beatles
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So.
Having your tonsils removed kind of hurts. I guess the vicoden would help if it didn't make me so sick. At least this will all be over in 7-10 days.
I have to miss Anathallo and The Hard Lessons playing at the Magic Stick tomorrow night. I am sad.

Saturday, 02 September 2006

Currently Listening
Broken Social Scene
By Broken Social Scene
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I have not updated in two million years. Or two months. Whatever. This summer was absolutely incredible. Lollapalooza was amazing. I really miss it sometimes, I even find myself wishing I could re-live it. I got to go up north again for the fourth of July, and it felt like an oasis away from normal life. I love vacations from normal. Camping with the family was different than it has been in the past, but still fun packed. It was sooooooooo nice to have all of my friends home in Brighton for two months, but I am going to miss all them who are suddenly far away again terribly. I'm actually pre-emptively missing them already, as I'm writing this, but they haven't been gone for very long yet. Quite a few weekend trips will have to be made again this year.
Fall is coming. I can't wait to watch the leaves change color. I started school this past week, and it's been sort of a love/hate relationship thus far. I'm going to need to get better at being a morning person, seeing as I need to wake up at 7am on every weekday besides Friday from now on. Gross. Besides the whole 7am thing, I'm sort of looking forward to the rest of the school year. I'm taking Spanish, and I forgot how much I love it. I've made a few friends over the summer who are going to be around this year, and it makes me very, very happy because they are awesome people.
Exciting things are happening.
Also:
September 23- Anathallo and The Hard Lessons
October 6-Wilco
November 7-The Decemberists
November 11- Broken Social Scene!
mmmmmm :)
I love you all. Bye!

Monday, 12 June 2006

Currently Listening
Rabbit Fur Coat
By Jenny Lewis with The Watson Twins
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Today was my day off. It's amazing how the kind of days I used to hate-that is, days when everyone I know is busy and I find myself with nothing in particular to do, have become sort of a luxury now. Not that I have terrible working hours or anything. It's just nice to know that I can sit outside and read without thinking about work or anything else remotely resembling responsibility. It might have been nice to see a friend, but I think I might have needed a little bit of thinking time. Although I suppose I already over analyze everything that happens to me more than enough.

The other night, I was at a party. I was having fun just hanging out with friends, and meeting new people (although they were mostly people that I probably will never see again). Everything was going fine until I started talking to a guy who began to hint that he would like to hang out with me, and maybe even (gasp!) take me out to dinner. Inside, I freaked out just a little bit. Now, this was a perfectly nice, respectable, not even a little bit creepy sort of guy. In fact, I'm sure that if I had agreed to go out with him, I probably would have had an ok time. But I found myself making all of these excuses about why I shouldn't. I work a lot. He's really not my type. And other generic dating excuses that in the end, all come down to the same thing: I'm scared. And now I'm wondering why I am such a spaz (for lack of a better word). So I have decided that I don't really want to think about romance at all for the summer. I guess if something happens that feels right, I'll go with it, but for now I want to spend my free time with my wonderful, fabulous friends and not have to deviate one ounce of my attention away from having fun. So I guess I'm conciously single (like a cheese slice!).

Inspite of me being crazy, this summer seems to be off to a fantastic beginning. Besides working, I mean. I don't see as much of my friends as I wish I could (booooo, summer jobs) but that just makes it that much better when I do. Summer is also concert season, local and otherwise, which means many nights of live music, crazy dancing and general awesomeness with amazing people. Yaaaay. (Countdown to Lollapalooza: 53 days!!!!)

So that's all for now my friends. Keep living life the way you feel. : )

Tuesday, 30 May 2006

Currently Listening
At War with the Mystics
By The Flaming Lips
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"If only we'd stop trying to be happy we could have a good time."
-Edith Wharton-

I think there is something very wrong with me. I want too badly to be happy. Maybe some would say that I'm crazy, thinking that wanting to be happy is a bad thing. It's not bad to want to be happy. Everybody wants to be happy. It's written right into the Bill of Rights, for crying out loud. So what, exactly, am I talking about you might ask (although you should never ask me what I'm talking about, as I am always the last to know).

In the past month or so, I have been feeling...well, for lack of a better description, I have been feeling sort of like I'm going nuts. Seriously. I shouldn't be this crazy. I should be incredibly, fantastically happy--right? All of my friends are finally home for the summer. I have a steady, and relatively easy job. There is no terrible or dire situation in my life right now that is causing me immense anxiety. But still, somehow, I find myself stressing out about things that should not be as difficult as I make them. I just can't help but wonder what I'm going to do when my friends go back to school in the fall. And although my job is relatively easy, it bothers me that the woman who gave it to me (who also happens to be my aunt) doesn't really believe that I will ever be as good at it as my sister is. And in spite of the fact that my family should be the last thing stressing me out, when I'm worrying a lot about something, I'm starting to realize that it's usually related to what's going on at home.

I keep trying so hard not to let all of my pent up, un-needed stress get to me. All that I really want is just to be as happy as I was a few months ago. I keep putting all of this pressure on myself and everything around me to make me happy, and I end up making myself miserable. Something's missing, but this is not the way to find it. It's not that I feel so terrible all the time. There are times when I can just let go with my friends and be content with things. I just wish that at the end of the day, the good feelings would over power the bad ones.I guess what I really, truly need to do is relax.

I want to stop worrying about what's going to happen in my future.
I want to soak up every moment of the summer.
I want to play in the sun with my friends.
I want to lay in the grass at night and watch the stars.
I want to sit on my front porch and watch thunderstorms.
I want to ride the highest rollercoaster. Twice.
I want to feel free again.

So I guess...I will?

P.S. I have decided that I am not writing in here again unless it's about something happy. Updates have been few and far between as it is, so I'm sure no one will really mind.

-Only a fool believes that he is different from the birds in the sky-